Apr. 28th, 2017

Decisions

Apr. 28th, 2017 04:04 pm
princessofburundi: (Default)
So I've decided to go forward and take a series of online courses that will qualify me to teach English as a Second Language. I've been thinking about it for weeks, and I can't see any downside to it. It all sounds great, especially the part where I might get to travel to someone wonderful and teach English there. I'm starting to brush up on my Spanish (at this moment I could order a beer but not say much else), so that my hopes of working in a Latin American country could be more easily facilitated. I would really like to use Spanish on a daily basis, so going somewhere like Peru or Chile or somewhere in Central America would be ideal. I'm actually getting a bit excited at the possibilities of teaching abroad. South America would be my first choice.

My elder daughter taught English in Ecuador for a few months some years back and loved her immersion into Latin American life, especially the weddings to which her entire Andean village was invited, including her, and which lasted for days. She also loved being able to pick fresh fruit for her breakfast from her host family's yard. Imagine waking up to fresh mangoes! On the way to her classroom in the morning she would always be approached by friendly alpacas, which she hand fed with fruit and sugar, and which sometimes followed her to school. D. was 9,000 feet up in the Andes, and the scenery was unbelievable. I would love an experience like hers. Of course, she was 18 and highly adaptable and very healthy, whereas I'm 53, diabetic, with mental health issues, and more set in my ways, but I think I could find myself a safe place in a new environment.

When I say "safe place", what I mean is my bed. When life gets rough I have the world's comfiest bed, and just sitting on it for a few minutes calms me down. Obviously I can't take my bed with me if I travel, but I can take elements of it - my snuggly blanket or one of my teddy bears, and be reminded of the safety of my cosy bedroom. I'd need that if I were working overseas, and I'll even need it when I go to the UK this September. I'm sure if I were living for three months in a foreign country that I could establish for myself a safe place to which I could retreat when panic threatens.

It's been another beautiful day, sun shining, blue sky, not too warm, and I had a nice time having coffee with my mother, which is something we do every Friday afternoon.
princessofburundi: (Default)
I have had such a good day. Yes, I woke up with the panic attack from hell and had to pop an Ativan just to get me moving, and I was so afraid to go out of the house that I nearly cancelled coffee with my mother. But I didn't....I went and had a pleasant time seeing her.

Throwing myself back into things that I like has helped so much. It took so much energy to take that first step into old pleasures, but it was worth that fearful first step. I've had a nice long phone conversation with my daughter, the 18 year old. I've spent hours studying Spanish, and it's been a lot of fun. I'd forgotten how much I love language study. I've been reading.....I have three books on the go right now. Using my brain and learning new things really get my mind off my problems. Also, I've eaten healthy foods, which I'm sure is part of the temporary lull in the depression.

It's so nice not to feel terrified of my own shadow.

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princessofburundi

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