Decisions

Apr. 28th, 2017 04:04 pm
princessofburundi: (Default)
So I've decided to go forward and take a series of online courses that will qualify me to teach English as a Second Language. I've been thinking about it for weeks, and I can't see any downside to it. It all sounds great, especially the part where I might get to travel to someone wonderful and teach English there. I'm starting to brush up on my Spanish (at this moment I could order a beer but not say much else), so that my hopes of working in a Latin American country could be more easily facilitated. I would really like to use Spanish on a daily basis, so going somewhere like Peru or Chile or somewhere in Central America would be ideal. I'm actually getting a bit excited at the possibilities of teaching abroad. South America would be my first choice.

My elder daughter taught English in Ecuador for a few months some years back and loved her immersion into Latin American life, especially the weddings to which her entire Andean village was invited, including her, and which lasted for days. She also loved being able to pick fresh fruit for her breakfast from her host family's yard. Imagine waking up to fresh mangoes! On the way to her classroom in the morning she would always be approached by friendly alpacas, which she hand fed with fruit and sugar, and which sometimes followed her to school. D. was 9,000 feet up in the Andes, and the scenery was unbelievable. I would love an experience like hers. Of course, she was 18 and highly adaptable and very healthy, whereas I'm 53, diabetic, with mental health issues, and more set in my ways, but I think I could find myself a safe place in a new environment.

When I say "safe place", what I mean is my bed. When life gets rough I have the world's comfiest bed, and just sitting on it for a few minutes calms me down. Obviously I can't take my bed with me if I travel, but I can take elements of it - my snuggly blanket or one of my teddy bears, and be reminded of the safety of my cosy bedroom. I'd need that if I were working overseas, and I'll even need it when I go to the UK this September. I'm sure if I were living for three months in a foreign country that I could establish for myself a safe place to which I could retreat when panic threatens.

It's been another beautiful day, sun shining, blue sky, not too warm, and I had a nice time having coffee with my mother, which is something we do every Friday afternoon.

Tired

Apr. 18th, 2017 02:59 pm
princessofburundi: (Default)
It's 3:00 pm and I'm beat. I have so much to do around the house but it's going to have to wait for an hour or two.

This morning I had to fend off another powerful panic attack - brain, this can stop anytime you like, preferably NOW - and then shower and dress and put makeup on to have lunch with my mum. Picked up cat supplies en route to lunch; spent lunch hour hearing about how I have no backbone and am too dependent upon people. Heard the story of my suffragette grandmother who emigrated to Canada, arriving in Toronto with 29 cents in her poocket, and how she didn't let that get her down. Apparently, getting help from social workers and the hospital is another form of weakness; I should be taking care of my mental health without "leeching" (I'm quoting) off community services. My mum is so good to me except when she isn't, and today she really, really wasn't, but at least she paid for lunch.

Picked up prescriptions, did a healthy shop - no junk except for pretzels, which are lower calorie and salt than potato chips - as my blood sugar is quite high - last night it was 15.2 which is way over the top. I wonder if high blood sugar and panic attacks are related?

Now I'm just going to sit here for a bit and release the tension and the tiredness. Then I must do chores, bleah.

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princessofburundi

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