Forgetting

May. 17th, 2017 01:12 am
princessofburundi: (Default)
I keep forgetting that Dreamwidth is a thing, so I don't post or comment because I've forgotten about it. I will catch up with people's journals this weekend, I promise!

here's what's going on with me )
princessofburundi: (Default)
Potentially exciting news! I talked with a man named David (probably not his real name) in Seoul, South Korea about half an hour ago, and as long as I purchase a better web cam than the one that I have now, I have an online teaching job starting next week. I would be teaching English to Korean elementary school students. The contract is verbal, so I am not 100% sure that it's going to pan out, but I'm going to buy that webcam anyway and hope that I really do get to teach these kids. I'm going to be starting my TESOL (Teaching English to Students of Other Languages) coursework this week, and a few months down the road I'm hoping to take the English teaching gig on the road, somewhere interesting and exciting.

I know I'm planning WAY ahead, but I've been looking at job postings for ESL teaching and thinking about where I'd like to go. For the first time in ages I'm daydreaming again, imagining myself in a teaching job somewhere in the world, and going exploring around the country on my days off. Mostly, I'd like to go somewhere where Spanish is spoken so that I have a chance of making myself understood, but the Latin American countries don't pay as well as Asian countries do. My most frequently-visited thought is that I'd love to teach in Cusco, Peru, which is in the high Andes, and which is only 75 km. from Machu Picchu, which is one of my dream destinations. And Cusco is a *gorgeous* city.

I don't want to teach in mainland China, and that's that. Nor does Japan interest me very much. But Hong Kong looks interesting, and isn't on the mainland, or I could go to Ulaanbator in Mongolia, or somewhere in Vietnam near Halong Bay. Halong Bay and the steppe of Mongolia are also on my must-see list.

It is lovely to have goals and daydreams again. This is the sort of thing that keeps the black dogs of depression off my back. I feel anxious - what if I can't do this? - but mostly I'm excited and trying not to second-guess myself.

The Spanish lessons and readings I'm doing are coming along well. I really really want to put my Spanish to the test somewhere! Pity that there's not job openings in Puerto Rico, which I love unreservedly.

Saturday

Apr. 29th, 2017 08:58 pm
princessofburundi: (Default)
It is entirely possible that I've caught up with the backlog in my inbox. That is a satisfying feeling, but so is coming to Dreamwidth to an inbox full of messages!

Today has been a dreary day and I have nothing of interest to pass along. The only things I've done are grocery shopping and some Spanish practice at Duolinguo. For the rest of the day I plan to read, although to be fair, some of what I read is going to be in Spanish - I have a graded Spanish reader with questions after each chapter. I am looking forward to the day when once again I start thinking in Spanish half the time.
princessofburundi: (Default)
I have had such a good day. Yes, I woke up with the panic attack from hell and had to pop an Ativan just to get me moving, and I was so afraid to go out of the house that I nearly cancelled coffee with my mother. But I didn't....I went and had a pleasant time seeing her.

Throwing myself back into things that I like has helped so much. It took so much energy to take that first step into old pleasures, but it was worth that fearful first step. I've had a nice long phone conversation with my daughter, the 18 year old. I've spent hours studying Spanish, and it's been a lot of fun. I'd forgotten how much I love language study. I've been reading.....I have three books on the go right now. Using my brain and learning new things really get my mind off my problems. Also, I've eaten healthy foods, which I'm sure is part of the temporary lull in the depression.

It's so nice not to feel terrified of my own shadow.

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